Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

June 20, 2002

Bozo criminals for today come from the Shoulda Known Better Department in Stuart, Florida. Five teenage car thieves were on the run from the local sheriff and decided to jump into a pond to hide. Not the best idea for a number of reasons. First, you can only hold your breath for so long until you have to come up for air. Second, some strange varmints live in Florida ponds. And, third, as the sheriff’s deputies pointed out to our bozos, it’s gator mating season! They then shined a flashlight into the eyes of two nearby alligators. That was enough for our bozos. They came scrambling out of that pond faster than you can say "gator bait."

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