Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

February 5, 2002

Bozo criminal for today comes from Mesa, Arizona where you could say bozo thief Michael Jardine was having a bad week. First, his fake gun shattered into a thousand pieces when he dropped it while trying to rob a drug store. He ran away and the following day tried again. He went up to a checker in a supermarket and handed her a $20 bill to pay for a candy bar. When she opened the register he sprayed her with pepper spray and tried to grab some cash but she slammed it shut before he could get any. Then he started having an asthma attack brought on by the pepper spray. He struggled to his car only to find he had locked the keys inside. He grabbed a nearby rock, broke the window and sped away only to be stopped by the cops a few blocks later for driving without his headlights on.

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