Dave Moreland's Bozo Criminal of the Day - The world famous daily report on dumb crimes

February 13, 2002

All of us who are still struggling to lose that holiday weight may be able to relate to today’s bozo. From the International File in Cape Town, South Africa comes the story of bozo Calvin Smith who attempted to break into a home by squeezing between the burglar bars and the front door. Perhaps it was that extra slice of pie he’d enjoyed at Christmastime but our bozo was a little too big to get through and he got stuck between the bars and the door. Stuck tight. He couldn’t move in either direction. So he did what any bozo would do. He knocked on the door until the homeowner answered. Seeing our bozo’s plight, he quickly called the cops. He’s been arrested and put on a low fat diet.

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